This Is Our House

My roommates and I have been living together for the past two years. None of us knew each other prior to moving in. Lucky for us, everything worked out great. One of them even turned out to be my best friend (not saying the other isn’t great too but we have more things in common). We each have our own busy schedules so we aren’t home too much with each other. This leaves the house clean and empty most of the time.

My one roommate Rochell is the mom of the house. She takes care of the bills, cleans when she gets nervous, and makes sure everything is running smoothly while working 60 hours a week. She doesn’t have a lot of friends which is understandable when you work so much but at the same time she likes being by herself. She likes to lock herself in her room and not come out for hours. Even when people are over she doesn’t socialize. I know everyone is different when it comes to groups but sometimes I wish she would let loose and have some fun.

Becca, on the other hand, works two jobs while going to school. Like Rochell she doesn’t have very many friends but makes the most out of the ones she has. She is super smart and really nerdy (too the extreme- she just turned 24 and had a Harry Potter birthday party). She loves to read…. a lot. Try three to five novels a day. Becca is also the clumsiest person I have ever meet. The other day she fell while she was walking and somehow managed to scrap both sides of her hands… how does that even happen? She is loud, runs into everything within a three foot radius, and drops anything she is holding.

Then there’s me. I’m not going to spend too much time talking about myself because every post is about me in some way or another. But I do have a lot of friends who I have over pretty often. I’m a little OCD in that I have to have certain objects in certain places or else I go crazy. I always like our house to be nice and clean but have a relaxed personality at the same time. The most important is that I stay calm in hectic situations.

Even though we are all different we seem to manage living together. But this this comes the price. The curse of 510. At least this is our excuse as to why things happen in our house.

The curse includes us breaking things all the time. The other day a bottle of grenadine magically fell off the fridge and covered every white surface in the kitchen making it turn to a bright red. I thought I had cleaned all of it but the next day managed to find it on the ceiling. Rochell being taller than me went to clean it off. Somehow the glass dome covering the kitchen light came crashing down scattering everywhere. Of course, Rochell was wearing sandals and of course, 90 percent of the glass shards made their way into her shoes. That whole mess was fun to clean up. About 80 percent of our glassware has been broken…. we have now switched to plastic kids cups.
Not only that but weird people are always showing up at our door. One night, I about had a hard attack as I was sitting on our porch. I thought I had heard a noise to my left but when I saw nothing I looked back to my right. There a man had stood between me and the door to the house. His eyes were wide and dark as he stared at me.

He held is hand out ,”My spoon broke eating my ice cream.”
“Okay,” was all I could get out.
“Do you have another one?” He asked me still holding out his hand.
“No, but there is Wendy’s two blocks down and they could get you one,” I said in hopes that he would leave.
“Okay, thanks,” He handed me his broken plastic spoon. Once he was off the porch I darted inside locking the door behind me. In my hand laid three broken pieces that would fit together to make a spoon. My hand was sticky from the melting ice cream. I threw away the broken spoon thinking about what occurred. I realized when the man had talked to me he held nothing else but the spoon. So where did the ice cream go and if he didn’t have any ice cream why would he need another spoon. That night I didn’t sleep every good.

The worst of the curse is the boy situation. Apparently if you live in our house you are never allowed to have a boyfriend. Ever since we have moved in none of us have had any luck finding a guy.

All in all, this is our house and we are stuck with it. The good and the bad (more like creepy but I’ll stick with the phrase for now). We don’t plan on leaving anytime soon which is fine by me because we all love living here.

Window Pain

mom holding handsThroughout our lives we have plenty of embarrassing moments. Some define us, some make for a good story, and others make us wish we were never born. I have had a mix of all of these. As I have gotten older, I have been able to laugh them off more than I used too proving to myself and others we can move on with our lives because that moment was only a spec in time.

But I will always remember the first time being embarrassed.

It was a nice summer day and I was spending it with my mom and her best friend. It was fun at first but an 8 year can only last so long. We were stopping by what seemed like the 100th store of the day and their constant jabbering had not wavered since meeting up earlier in the day. From the talking, to driving, to looking through all the different stores I had acquired a headache.
I knew my mom wouldn’t leave me in the car because it was too hot out and she wouldn’t let her 8 year old wander within the store where she could potential get lost or stolen. So I asked if she would hold my hand while I closed my eyes in hopes the headache would disappear.

“Sure, honey,” is all she said as she took mine in hers. After what seemed like an eternity, I could hear my mom and her friend talking to the cashier. Thank goodness, because I was really tired and I knew this was the last stop. I could finally go home and take a nap. With my eyes still closed, my mom dragged me with her as we continued on our way.

WHAM! The next thing I knew my eyes flew open and my head was throbbing worse than it was before. I grabbed my head and looked up to see what had happened. My mom had tried walking out the right side of double doors. I just happened to be holding her left hand meaning my mom ran me into the other glass door!

All of a sudden laughter erupted. My mom and her friend could hardly contain themselves. Other people in the store were also laughing as they witnessed the event. I stormed into the parking lot as my mom and her friend’s laughter followed me.

My mom could barley get out the words as she climbed into the driver’s seat, “I’m sorry, I forgot your eyes were closed.” I didn’t say a single word the whole car ride back as they still continued to laugh.

Now, I look back and laugh at what happened. At the time, I didn’t think it was very funny as embarrassment wash over me but now I think it’s hilarious. Every time I tell the story I die of laughter and tears stream down my face as I relive the moment.

Just remember, parents try to lead their kids in the right direction….. sometimes they run them into doors. It happens.

One Trip Down The Rabbit Hole… If You Know What I Mean

IMG00780-20130126-1847What I am about to tell you is a true story. Well at least I think it is. You know how stories can become more extravagant and outrageous the more times they have been said/passed on. I heard this story from my roommate, who heard it from an acquaintance, who experienced it first hand. So this story can’t be too far fetched right?

Anyways, here it goes. For an easier read, let’s name the acquaintance Joey.

Joey and two of his friends heard that their favorite band was playing. The downside, it was at a rave….. in the middle of a dense forest…. about 40 miles away from the nearest human life form. Even though they had never been to a rave the three of them HAD to see their favorite band…. no matter how many weirdos might be out there.

It was a three day event, so they packed up their camping gear and slowly made their way through the many trails the forest had created. Eventually, they made it to the large clearing. Hundreds of tents outlined the forest edge leaving space center stage to enjoy the music. Apparently, the three days flew by.

It was the last day, Joey and his friends were packing up enjoying the last few moments they had left. A man came up and asked if they wanted some eye drops since the weather was so dry. The friends obliged.

Joey noticed that the drops stung as he blinked the fuzziness away. “What kind of drops are those? He asked watching as his friends squeezed the liquid into their eyes.

“This?” The guy pointed to the bottle laughing. “Oh this is just acid, don’t worry too much about it.”

Joey and his friends looked at each other with fright. They had to leave…..now! They practically ran back to the car located a mile or so from the camp site. The entire way scared of what was about to happen to them.

This next part is unclear as to why they decided driving was a good idea while on acid but the three of them found themselves driving endlessly through the deep forest as crazy images started appearing. It had now become dark and of course they were lost when they spotted something in the middle of the dirt road. They pulled over and went to investigate.

“It’s a troll!” One of the friends shouted with glee. The other two followed and found what their friend said to be true. After sometime playing with the magical troll, they decided to bring it back with them to the hotel they were going to be staying at.

Once at the hotel, they locked the troll in the closet afraid it might try to escape.

Joey, a few hours later, woke first shaking the other two awake. “I’m never trusting anybody ever again,” he told them as he slowly got ready. “Last night was too crazy.”

“Yeah, I can’t believe we all hallucinated bringing back a troll,” one of the others laughed. The three of them looked at each other then and slowly to the closet door. Did they actually bring something back with them? and if so what was it?

Joey slowly made his way over to the door. Twisting the knob he peered in, “Oh shit.”

The others came over to investigate why Joey’s face looked like he had seen a ghost. There, asleep on the floor, was a little girl. Yes, that’s right, you read that correctly. A little girl! They had kidnapped a little girl.

Of course, they panicked but they knew they had to go to the police. Come to find out they had not, in fact, kidnapped a little girl. Instead, they had saved a little girl who had been missing for months. To their luck, someone had previously kidnapped her and was hiding out in the forest with her.

This story has a happy ending but I always tell it to people. I tell this story as a lesson to people who are active in the drug world. I want them to have second thoughts on whether they should do them or not. I have never done drugs in my life and never plan on it. Especially after what these friends had to go through together. Some people say smoking weed is harmless but it is one life choice I intend to keep. For those who don’t, that is their life choice and they can stick with it but they have to remember there are consequences.

 

When Creatures Attack

IMG00849-20130623-0802I live about a mile and a half away from my job. Until recently, I didn’t own a car and so I would walk. Being from Montana, this would mean getting there through 3 feet deep snow, tropical storms, blazing hot summer days, and wind that could blow a house over. Now I may be exaggerating slightly(not about the snow) but those twenty minutes would be the worst twenty minutes of my life.

I also work weird hours and would sometimes be walking home in complete darkness at 1 in the morning. One afternoon, while I was enjoying the music playing from my iPod, I scanned across a large field that separates residential housing from businesses placed on the outskirts of town. A thought ran through my head as I gazed over the field ,”What would I do if there was a bear out there?” (For those of you who aren’t familiar Montana bears appear everywhere. Several have meandered onto campus a few times. So the chances of a bear being in the field is very likely). Many thoughts raced through my head as I imagined one of the scenarios taking place. I laughed it off and continued home.

The next night, I was again walking by the field, this time though at 1 in the morning. I was looking at my iPod trying to find a song I wanted to listen to when I heard a rustling. I looked up and there in the middle of the field was a large black mass. I stopped dead in my tracks. A freaking bear was only a few yards away from the trail. Still frozen I tried to remember what to do in case of a bear attack. Stop, drop, and roll.. oh wait that’s in case of a fire. Lay down and pretend your dead, right? Right before I was about to lay down my eyes started adjusting. I sighed a huge relief and then started laughing uncontrollably as I realized my mistake. The ‘bear’ was actually a large shrub growing in the middle of what was supposed to be a really flat field. I pretty much laughed the entire way home happy it wasn’t a real bear and also thinking about how big of an idiot I was to think it was a bear. Every time I passed the field, after the incident, I would always chuckle to myself and how we can play our own mind tricks.

So I know the title says “When Creatures Attack”, I am actually getting to the story… I promise…. but I first had to explain my relationship I had with this field.

It was a few months later and the sun’s rays were beating down on me. I was hot and sweaty (not a good way to start work especially when you have to look presentable). Usually, I avoided the field afraid I would get tangled or pricked in the long weeds. But for some reason that day I decided to take a short cut consisting of me walking across it. I could practically feel the A/C waiting for me as I spied the building across the way.

I started my trek and, as before, listening to my music. I was almost there when I looked up from my iPod. Only a few more steps. I looked back down as I placed my right foot. There, literally, touching my shoe was a prairie dog. I stopped, terrified because it had surprised me. We both looked at each other wide-eyed. It seemed like minutes but it was merely a second. Before I knew it the thing lunged itself at me. Over and over again it tried getting up my leg. All I could do was scream and jump up and down. As fast as it began it was over. The thing took off and there I was, alone, standing in the middle of the field.

I looked over to find construction workers staring at me. To them, I probably looked like an idiot girl screaming for no reason…how embarrassing. I quickly made my way inside relieved to get some cool air.

“How’s it going?” A co-worker asked.

“Well, I just got attacked by a prairie dog. How about you?” I laughed.

So now I can say I’ve been attacked by a prairie dog (I bet you can’t). What a weird creature to be attacked by, right?

A Birthday Gift, A Competition, and A Boy

IMG00593-20110806-1517“I have a problem,” I told my roommate over the phone.

“Not again. It’s like the third time this week,” she sighed. I could tell she was shaking her head.

“I can’t help it. I’m addicted. From now on, anytime I mention this slap me silly because I need to stop….like now,” I looked down at what I was holding. I really couldn’t help it.

Now let’s back up. It all started with a birthday gift I had given to my roommate. She was always complaining about how she never does anything fun. So for her birthday I put together a booklet of cheap activities she could do over the summer. They were fun, simple, and brought a ton of laughs with them. One day we decided to do two at once. So we headed to the mall.

We had 45 minutes to find the creepiest object we could under 5 dollars. The other was to find as many things as possible under 10 dollars. It was on! Now when I gave this booklet to my roommate I meant for it to be fun and relaxing. But when it comes to competitions nobody better stand in my way because I will beat you down to win. I’m sort of a sore loser…. I’m not afraid to admit that.

Anyways, there was only 10 minutes left and I had only gotten the 5 dollar item. I was rushing in and out of stores trying to find the best possibility of finding something cheap with as many things attached to it as possible. I ran into a store and found the closest employee. He turned around and even though my heart was beating fast from the adrenaline it stopped instantly.

“Hhhh, hi,” I choked out trying to catch my breath. He was beautiful. I would describe him more but their isn’t enough words to describe his beauty. Finally, when I was actually able to form words, I told him my situation and he lead me straight to the socks. They were buy one get one meaning I could get two packs for the price of ten dollars. 40 items total if you didn’t count them as a pair. I surely had to win. I looked at my phone seeing I still had 8 minutes to spare.

Those eight minutes were the best eight minutes of my life as I had Jason, he finally introduced himself, lead me around the store. But sadly enough the 8 minutes were up and I had to leave because even though I thought I had run into the guy of my dreams I HAD to win the competition.

For the next couple of weeks I had went back to the store in hopes of “running” into Jason. I would wander around looking through the merchandise and seeing all the great deals patiently waiting for Jason to show up (I know this is probably considered stalking but it was for a good cause… my relationship status). Every time I would buy something off the clearance rack (to make it look like I was actually shopping). Their shirts were amazing and only two to three dollars each. What a steal!

So now I was going not for Jason but the deals. I was going two to three times a week and still am.  I work at a retail store and yet my closet is filled with this one brand. From socks, shoes, shirts, and even hats! It really is a problem. I don’t think I have obsessed over something like this ever before. It has been over two weeks since the last time I went and now that I am thinking about it I am going to break that streak. I’m going tomorrow. It’s a plan.

For those of you who want to know…… The store is Rue21 and as I’m typing this my entire outfit I am wearing is from there. Jason no longer works there so at least I won’t have a restraining order against me anytime soon. The employees know me by name….. seriously I have a problem. And last, I won the 10 dollar challenge but lost the 5 dollar one-BLAST!